La Femme de Gilles by Madeleine Bourdouxhe

Author:Madeleine Bourdouxhe [Bourdouxhe, Madeleine]
Language: eng
Format: epub
ISBN: 978-1-61219-588-9
Publisher: Melville House
Published: 2016-11-15T05:00:00+00:00

11

This good mood lasted barely two days, then Gilles again became nervous, angry, violent even, whenever he was crossed. They were to spend Easter Sunday with Elisa’s parents, but when they arrived Victorine had gone out.

‘She’s gone to enjoy herself with people of her own age,’ Elisa’s mother explained.

Gilles was at a peak of irritation: he looked at the clock, he watched the comings and goings of passers-by from behind the curtains, he prowled around on the spot like a chained dog. At one point Elisa feared that his unnatural state of distress would arouse the curiosity of the two old people, but they were too preoccupied with the children to notice—besides, she said to herself sadly, how could they possibly guess at the cause? When it was time for them to go, Victorine still wasn’t back.

‘I ought to go home because of the children,’ Elisa said, ‘but if you want to stay a little longer …’

‘No,’ Gilles said in a churlish voice. ‘I’ll come too.’

They walked back through the darkened streets, Elisa carrying the baby, Gilles at her side, the two little girls just in front of them. As they passed the river the twins, just for fun, walked on the very edge of the quay. Gilles pulled them back abruptly, uttering the only sentence he’d spoken in the entire journey: ‘Now that really would be the end, if you two fell into the water!’

Elisa called them to her and told them both to hang on to the edge of her coat. They went on their way, Gilles saying nothing, looking straight ahead, Elisa observing his clenched jaw, his hard, embittered face. At that moment she felt real pity for him.

When they got home he sat with one elbow on the table, still saying nothing. Elisa fed the baby, a handkerchief stretched over her breast because the little girls were in the room. Then she took the children to bed, continually urging them to behave: ‘You must keep quiet, you mustn’t make a noise—your daddy is very tired.’

When she came down Gilles hadn’t moved, but his arms were crossed on the table, his head leaning on them; he looked like a man who’d fallen asleep on the spot, wiped out by fatigue. Taking advantage, Elisa said: ‘Gilles, you’ve fallen asleep on the table—let’s go to bed, my dear, you seemed so tired today.’

She poured out a cup of coffee and put it beside him. ‘Come on, have some coffee, it’ll do you good.’

He didn’t move, didn’t reply, but freeing one of his arms, sought out Elisa’s hand and squeezed it, in a complete gesture of friendship. Elisa was so moved that she didn’t dare speak, for fear of betraying herself; she simply squeezed his hand back. Then she went to sit beside him; at last she could speak. ‘Perhaps you’ve caught a touch of flu—you can’t trust the weather at this time of year; it’s so easy to catch something.’

He lifted his head; she waited for what was to come.

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